If you’ve read very many of my posts, you’ll know that one of my compelling reasons for starting this blog was because I have serious issues with quite a few of the TWOP editors and recappers, and most especially Cindy McLennan’s recaps of TVD. So let’s get that rant out of the way, mmmkay?

First, she has a problem with Bonnie’s accepting a pendant made out of human bone without question. Well, too fucking bad. You’re not a witch. You know jack all about the religion, the light side, the dark side, or any ritual work of any branch or coven of it. You have no goddamn clue what’s acceptable and what isn’t, nor have we been privy to Shane’s education of Bonnie, which presumably included a more complete education on the history of witchcraft rather than just how to use Expression. And, in fact, Bonnie did have a reaction. She was uncomfortable, startled, and a little grossed out. Then Shane told her it was 2000 years old, and instead of mourning the dead elephant the cute little ivory figurine came from, she dealt with it like a rational human being. Quit pushing your own damn values on the characters (more on that later. Maybe).

Second, Bonnie wasn’t too busy returning Kol’s eye flirts. She didn’t recognize him.  She hasn’t seen him in a while, she has no expectations of seeing him because he’d been daggered, and a lot of shit has gone down in Mystic Falls since then! She’d probably have had the same reaction if it was Rebekah instead.

Speaking of Rebekah, she didn’t order the kids not to run. She ordered them not to “vamprun”, what we refer to as “Stealth Salvatore”. She said nothing about running away on their own human feetsies, and they’d been previously compelled not to leave the school. When they ran, it made sense to split up because Tyler would only be able to go one direction at a time. Two fleeing prey were better than one. They’ve been in similar situations often enough that they didn’t even need to discuss it, and even if they did, then it happened between camera shots. One shot we see them choosing to run, the next shot we see them coming out of the library and splitting up. Since they weren’t right next to the door, there was plenty of time for Stefan to say, “Caroline, head to the gym. Elena and I will try to hold him off long enough for him to overcome the change.” (I’m very close to putting this next part in all caps) We didn’t need to see it happen for it to have occurred. We have watched this damn show long enough and the characters are not so stupid as for them to not be able to take action without hand holding us through the exposition. And they don’t, which is why we like it!

Whew. Hang in there, folks, I’m getting it out of my system.

Kol did not waterboard Shane. He attempted to drown him. There is a difference. Let me guess, you’re one of the people who thinks ZeroDarkThirty shouldn’t be nominated for Oscars because it accurately depicts the torture that did occur by American troops in Guantanamo?

OK, I think that’s everything. Now for the stuff I do agree with her on (to an extent). First, yeah, I think Shane has a twisted idea of what Expression is. It requires human sacrifice, and a large one. Blood magic is dark magic, I’m not arguing that. And there are rules for it; OUAT is closer to the truth when they say that magic requires a price.

Second, something the show has evidently glossed over is the fact that Tyler already told Elena the sire bond doesn’t affect your feelings for the person, yet she, and Damon, and Caroline, and everyone else continue to act like that’s the only reason she could possibly be in love with him. C’mon, I’ve been in love with him since Season 2 despite his murderous and abusive ways and I’m not sire bonded to him! (Yeah, I guess I’m a bit like Belle with Rumpy in that, but then we’re approaching another area where Cindy puts her personal values on fictional characters so I’ll shut up now).

As usual, After School Special had a dizzying, breakneak pace, and even getting Rebekah up to speed took almost no time at all. I was actually glad she compelled Elena to tell the truth about how she felt about Stefan and Damon.  First, Elena needed to admit her feelings for Damon out loud, to herself as well as to Stefan. Second, she needed to let Stefan know she’s a person, not a broken toy or project, which is exactly how he’s been acting ever since she turned, and I think that truth hurt him just as much as learning she’s fallen out of love with him and in love with Damon, even if he still (incorrectly, AFAIC [which I use to mean As Far As I’m Concerned]) blames it on the sire bond.

*edited to add this paragraph* I’m not surprised that Stefan told Rebekah he wanted his memories of Elena wiped. I don’t think he really expected her to do it (and BTW, Cindy, it’s Psych, no “e”), and I think he just really wanted to hurt Elena as much as he’d just been hurt. After all, this came from a man who’s felt his own compulsion to memorialize his Rippered victims on a secret closet wall.

As I said above, it made sense for Caroline to seperate from Stefan and Elena so she could be there for him when Tyler finally turned back, and how appropriate was it that he went straight to his mother’s memorial? Although my WSOD was stretched that there were a bunch of candles left burning in an empty school gymnasium.

I am glad that April’s been brought up to speed, but I have to wonder if she’s still wearing her bracelet or if Rebekah’s compelled her some more. It’s nice that Bonnie’s dad is finally onscreen, but we all know that non-witch (and some witch) blacks in Mystic Falls are like original series Star Trek redshirts, so if he was Liz’ seventh choice, what’s gonna happen when he goes down? And who are these other six who turned the job down due to the excessive amount of vampires in town, but are still sticking around and not doing anything about it?

As for Jeremy’s training, well, I kinda have to agree with both Klaus and  Damon. He does need to be able to protect himself, but it needs to happen sooner rather than later. Good to know he’s not above killing formerly innocent perky blondes, tho. I do have a bit of a question: though, where’s Elena? Let me ‘splain:

Klaus turns pizza girl, talks to Damon. Meanwhile, pizza girl is getting invited into the cabin and going after Matt. While Damon is heading toward the cabin, Jeremy is pulling her off of Matt and staking her, and Klaus Stealth Salvatores to a bar somewhere and forces everyone inside to drink his blood. As Damon is digging PG’s grave, Elena calls and declares her love. He tells her to come on down. Klaus, having finished killing all the bar flies, calls one of the three Musketeers and tells them to get their butts to his new vampire nest. They take off and evidently take their own sweet time getting there. Meanwhile, Elena’s on her way to the cabin and will find them aqll gone when she gets there, maybe with a note, maybe not? Got there and Damon told her to wait for him? Showed up as they were leaving and is now waiting in the car, and that’s what took them so long?

Oh, well, I still have shows to watch and blog about. Maybe now I can find a version of Top Chef that doesn’t stop abruptly ten minutes in.